Book and review 6,409 holiday parks and campsites in 20 European countries

Caravan conkers? Ten ways to destroy a caravan

July 11, 2012
by Laura Canning | guides

Caravans. Some people don’t like them. We think these people are a bit mad, but there’s no denying that caravan haters can sometimes be entertaining. And inventive. If you’ve ever lain awake at night and wondered just how best to destroy a caravan, or how to give your metallic friend a good send off after several happy years together, well, we can’t deny you’re a bit strange. But then these folks are too. Here are ten ways to destroy a caravan:

Try and reverse the laws of physics: ‘I think it’s stuck,’ says the chap in this clip, before trying to use his car to haul his caravan through a gap that’s too small. Yes, it is indeed stuck. It really really is.

Crush it like a tin can: We’re not sure what’s the most disturbing part of this clip – the absolute hammering of the caravan in question, or the maniacal cackling of the guys watching. We suspect the latter.

Drive a car through it: We like this one simply for its great sense of style and for the sheer nerve of the caravan destroyer. Although our lawyer has asked us to tell you not to try this at home. 


Get competitive: We like this one too, mainly for the red and white chequered caravan and the 80s-tastic music, even if the music did start to grate after about 6.1 seconds. Destroying a caravan, the makers of this video seem to reason, should be done in company. We suppose it makes sense, just for the competitive element.

Brainiac it up: Or why not just go the whole hog and destroy your caravan in a spectacular way, even more so than driving a car through it or crushing it while cackling? These folks show you how.

Get old-fashioned on it: The chaps from Top Gear of course have to turn up in any caravan destroying top ten, as they’re probably responsible for the wilful destruction of more vans than anyone else in the world. But at least here they wear goggles while doing it.

Fly for me, my pretty: Yes, it’s those caravan haters from Top Gear again, this time sending a caravan far, far away. This record breaking attempt at defying gravity didn’t break the record, but it did break the caravan.

Break the rules: The Top Gear chaps continue with their record breaking attempts here, taking a very liberal interpretation to the idea of ‘towing a caravan’. We think this one is a tad cheaty.

Try some DIY: We’re not saying caravans are always perfect. Sometimes they can feel a bit cramped, or sometimes for an inexplicable reason you wish you had another door. Here’s a novel approach to caravan improvement.


Timber it: Or, y'know, you could find another use for your chainsaw in your caravan destroying quest. Although it might be better to measure up and move the caravan a bit closer to the scene of destruction, unlike the guys in this clip.

We'd like to say that no caravans were harmed during the making of these clips. But...we're off for a cup of tea and a quiet lie down.


Comments